gottagetdrunkfirst: State of the Who the Fuck Cares!

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

State of the Who the Fuck Cares!

I won't be watching the State of the Union. If I want to hear some Marxism I'll just read some, "Communist Manifesto." Not. There is nothing that King Niggerhonkey Obama will say that I want to hear. Besides, he'll probably talk about himself most of the time. Instead, we'll be celebrating my daughter's 7th birthday.

9 comments:

kerrcarto said...: Tell her Happy Burfday from Texas!
I will also no be watching the Teleprompter read this evening. Instead I will be celebrating getting shitfaced.; January 27, 2010 at 10:53 AM
PeggyU said...: Happy birthday to your lovely daughter, Paul!

I think I will do something more pleasant than listening to Obama. The cat box needs a cleaning, for starters.; January 27, 2010 at 11:05 AM
Patriot Gretchen said...: Happy Birthday Precious girl!

I will be playing State of the Unit "What did he just fuckin say"
Drinkin game

Anyone else into it?; January 27, 2010 at 6:32 PM
Barry said...: I'm searching the guide to see what else will be on instead of watching State of the Coonion, low & behold, BET is now airing it. I do not remember them catering to W or any others? Then again, I usually don't pay attention to their scheduling. Fuck em.; January 27, 2010 at 7:53 PM
kerrcarto said...: My head hurts just from flipping channels. Is that blabber mouth really still blithering. Geez.; January 27, 2010 at 9:16 PM
Harper said...: I was thinking of taking a drink every time Blinky blinked. Not that much available liquor in Texas.; January 27, 2010 at 9:56 PM
Harper said...: Meant to say Happy Birthday to your little one Paul. She needs a few more stuffed animals, right?; January 27, 2010 at 9:57 PM
Paul said...: Funny you mentioned that Harper. Cora got a whole box full of stuffed animals. Her mom used them as stuffing to protect a fragile present she shipped up here. Too funny.; January 27, 2010 at 10:56 PM
Claudia said...: I'm sure Cora had a nice Birthday, Paul. You're always so good with your kids. All the best, always.:); January 29, 2010 at 3:15 AM

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Pure Genius

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.

~Sir Winston Churchill

To alcohol, the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

~Homer Simpson

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
~W.C. Fields

Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
~Benjamin Franklin

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.
~Hunter S. Thompson

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, That's as good as they're going to feel all day.
~Frank Sinatra

Here's to a long life and a merry one
A quick death and an easy one
A pretty girl and an honest one
A cold beer and another one!
~Author Unknown

Once during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
~W.C. Fields

Well ya see, Norm, it's like this.... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers.

~Cliff Clavin

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.

~ Dave Barry

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

~Henny Youngman

Our Lager which art in barrels
Swallowed be thy drink
At home, as it is in the tavern
Forgive our spillages
As we forgive those who spill against us
Lead us not into incarceration
But deliver us from hangover
For thine is the beer, the bitter and the barley.
Barmen
~The Beer's Prayer

Alcohol May Be Man's Worst Enemy

But The Bible Says Love Your Enemy

~ Frank Sinatra

That's the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink…If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen. - Charles Bukowski

The liver is evil and must be punished. - Author Unknown

I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer. -Homer Simpson

Write drunk; edit sober. - Ernest Hemingway

I take every day one beer at a time, one beer every sip at a time. - Dennis Leary

Alcohol doesn't solve your problems...but then,neither does milk. - W.C. Fields

‎"Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer." ~ Dave Barry

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

State of the Who the Fuck Cares!

9 comments:

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