Well, I've been putting it off long enough and decided to finally get my taxes done tonight. What a fuggin' nightmare! Thank God for TurboTax! At least I got to pound a few beers doing it online while watching the government take more of my money. By the way, Fuck.You.Government! Oh wait... you just dry-fucked me again didn't you?
Don't get me wrong, I don't mind paying taxes for infrastructure, road construction, etc, but all of this "poor me" bullshit mentality is over the fucking top. I'm at my wits end with this insanity. And it just keeps getting worse. If you're gonna tax the fuck out of me, at least let me put my taxes toward something I believe in. Border Security? Police Departments? I don't know... More border fence? More Border Patrol? More first responders? More military? When you assholes are taxin' me, the least you can do is spit on it before you ram it in.
That reminds me of a joke:
Q:What's the difference between jelly and jam? (C'mon, it's an easy one...)
I've worked since I was 10 years old doing shitty little 'chores' to learn the value of a buck. Lawn jobs, crushing cans for my dad, picking up dog turds, washing dad's truck, the list goes on and on. Then I turned 15 years old and had a permit to be on the books at a "real" job and I couldn't wait to earn a few bucks wrangling shopping carts in a parking lot, working at Sea World (that was really cool gig), digging ditches, retail sales, etc, and earning my money in the real world. The allowance was a thing of the past. It was the most independent I think I have ever felt in my life. Damn what a great feeling that was! I was earning my money dammit, and it was mine! Before I try and write my fucking memoirs tonight I'll cut it off at that.
Bottom line is I've been working an honest living consistently my entire adult fucking life and for what? So I can pay for homeboy down the street who's been on the dole his entire adult fucking life? Yeah, that really makes sense doesn't it?
Here's my real bitch... I was born and raised in the United States of America. Mexifornia to be exact. I love this country! I understand that some taxes are needed for road construction, infrastructure, etc. I'm not blind, but here it is. I have worked and paid my taxes ever since Uncle Sam was able to start pick-pocketing me when I was 15 years old and only had a work 'permit'. Work "permit"? You mean I have to have a fucking permit to work? I'm a fucking citizen you assholes! Try cracking down on the millions of wetbacks sapping this country dry. Can't do that? Fuck.You!
Last year I had a (unexpected) decent return from The People's Republik of Kalifornia. It was more than I expected, to be honest. This fucking year, I owe the State 1/2 the amount of my return from last year. Complete fucking insanity! Since Kalifornia is issuing I.O.U.'s to those getting returns this year, I should just send them an I.O.U. or a big fuckin' bag o' pennies. That would really make me giddy inside. I was really fired up to do it, but as my dad told me, "Don't fuck with the IRS". Thanks, Dad!
Fuck you government! Fuck.You! I am sick and tired of you assholes taking my hard earned money to give it to those lazy motherfuckers chompin' down on the gummint cheese! I lost my job at the first of the year, and I found one a few weeks later because I was actually looking for one and have a skill or two. Life, Liberty and the Persuit of Happiness. What part of that don't you assholes get?
I'm so fucking sick and tired of paying for you lazy niggers (not a term of race, but a state of mind) sappin' off of me and my fellow Countrymen and Countrywomen who do for themselves. When the SHTF you are gonna beg us after you beg the gummint for help. The gummint is gonna deny you because it's the fuckin' government. I'm gonna deny you because you are another liberal POS pawn. Hope. Change. Marxism.
Time to twist one and hit the sheets. I'm off work at noon tomorrow and that's one thing you cocksuckers in D.C. can't take away from me. At least not yet...
Fuck all of you in D.C.!