Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Speaking Of Fucking

This ass douche wants us to pay for her to fuck 2.74 people a day.

How else can you interperet wanting free womens health care rubbers and pills so you and your college sluts can go around fucking anything that will stick a dick in you. You are already getting a free ride to college so your saving quite a bit there use some of that money. Or you could, oh I don't know, get a fucking job to pay for your contraceptives.

This has nothing to do with healthcare and everything to do with lack of morals, that is what this really boils down to. You and your little whore college students indoctrinees need to keep your legs together and keep your pecker in your pants and you wouldn't have anything to worry about.

As for you Sandra, Good luck getting laid. I wouldn't fuck you with CD's dick with Paul pushing it. But I think that is a mute issue, since you look like you would prefer Janet Napalitano to CD or Paul.


Saw this picture on Drudge today, just begging for an honest caption...

Hey There Voter...

This is a great idea. I'm considering going and picking up some 3 x 5 cards and a roll of clear packing tape and doing this every time I fill up my truck until election day. One thing I would like to know though, is where the hell this picture was taken? $3.65? Shit, I just filled my truck today and the cheapest I saw was $4.19. That's just fucking ridiculous! I wonder if Peggy Joseph can spare some of that free gas Cooncracker was going to give her after he paid her mortgage.

If I had Peggy Joseph's address I would mail her one of these every day until election day.

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

NASCAR Sucks, Airbourne Doesn't

On Sunday I went to a party at a buddy's house to watch the Daytona 500, pound a bunch of PBR drafts from the home tapper and get de-runk. Not just an average day of throwing back countless beers and getting a good beer buzz, but more like getting good and belligerent, stumbly, fall-down, take off all your clothes, molest a bbq grill, piss-your-pants, legally and medically fucking shitfaced, plowed smashed drunk! To be honest, I didn’t even go to watch the race. I went to hang out with some good friends and get shitty drunk on a Sunday afternoon like God intended us to do. So I did.

I’m sure I’m gonna get a lot of shit for saying this, but getting sloshed is the only way I can sit in the house on a beautiful Sunday afternoon to watch a bunch of cars going around in circles for 500 miles or laps or whatever the fuck. I mean, how fucking exciting can that really get? Really? At least IndyCar tracks have multiple curves and turns that hold my interest for a little while. Unless there are some major wrecks and pileups on the track, NASCAR bores the living shit out of me.

But now there’s more. After I recently read about this fucking PC garbage from hell, my interest in watching NASCAR has dropped even more, if that was even possible. Not only does it bore the hell out of me, now they just went and shit the bed and they have lost all respect I ever had for the sport. In fact, they just earned the highest level of disrespect to be shown by me. What the fuck is with this bullshit “diversity” they are calling for in the sport? Who fucking gives two shits about “diversity?” (Which by the way is the biggest code word of the 21st Century, slowly chipping away at all things good and great in this country.) Diversity. GMAFB!

Sure, NASCAR is trying to market their shit to reach as many people as possible, but is that really going to include full on niggers, whiggers, jiggers, chiggers and wetbiggers too? Are they hoping for gang shootings in the stands at NASCAR races nationwide? Isn’t anything sacred anymore? Are we going to have some gansta nigga thugs on Pit Row with their jiggaboo jalopy with fucking curb feelers and spinny-wheels now? Is there going to be a BET car too? Maybe they could get Plaxico, or Michael Irvin, or Lawrence Taylor to drive the jiggaboo BET jalopy. Oh wait! How about OJ? There’s some diversity for ya! Is there anything or anyone’s asses they won’t kiss if there’s even a miniscule chance they might buy a fucking over-priced Kyle Busch shirt or an “Official NASCAR” over-priced license plate frame or over-priced nose hair trimmer? What the fuck!

I will now be going out of my way to make sure that I don’t give any business of any kind to anything NASCAR related. Ever. Sorry NASCAR, but you fucked up big denying the General Lee like that. I am surprised and really can’t believe how fast the PC pussification infected your entire organization. I would’ve expected more from you, so you have let me down yet again.

I hope you lose more fans from this than you ever gain. A lot more. Here’s an idea for next time; if someone says they are offended by the Confederate Flag, tell them that you don’t give a fuck and they should stick to watching Piss Mathews, Cuntessa Brewer, Bill Maher and Rosie and that they should stay in their little world of disinformation. Or try to offer them a lesson in American history. If they still don’t get it, try beating some sense into them with a crowbar or aluminum baseball bat. Only after all other avenues are exhausted, then try offering up your puckering lips to firmly plant on their ignorant asses!

Fuck you NASCAR!

Well shit. It happened again. The Youtube clip below was the original reason for this post and was supposed to be the only thing this post was about. It was going to follow the first paragraph in this post and have nothing except maybe a “Fuck Yeah!” after it. To me this is an obvious sign of THC deficiency in my system and should be remedied as soon as humanly possible.

I hadn’t heard of these guys before Sunday. I guess the latest iPhones have some app where you can hold your phone up to the TV or radio and it will tell you the song and the band. Pretty cool. A different song was in a commercial while we were watching the Daytona rain delay and I was curious who the band was. About three people pointed their iPhones at the TV at the same time to try and capture the song and that’s all it took. Airbourne; from Australia no less. I like how the lead guitarist is also the lead singer. That’s just not something you see every day. I also know that if you’re going to get out on stage with one of those Gibson Explorer guitars, you better not be playing shitty little Curt Cobain basic beginner leads. You better fucking shred with that guitar because it was made for a shredder, not some novice FNG wanna-be cock rocker!

I like these guys. Of course I’ve always been a huge AC/DC fan so I’m sure that has a little to do with it. Now before you get all frothy and your panties twisted in your crack, I’m not trying to compare these guys to AC/DC because that would just be fucking dumb. No one is like AC/DC. Period. But, you can definitely hear the Malcolm/Angus influence in their music that’s for sure.

This is one of those live extended intros that I happen to like, but if you aren't into that kind of thing, they kick off the song at about 3:00 on the counter.

Fuck yeah!

Monday, February 27, 2012

Uncle Ted Kills Again

Literally and Politicaly

Sunday, February 26, 2012


My Opa was released from jail the skilled nursing facility today, so we went and moved him, his TV and a tv stand (the only two things he wanted in his room) back home. He has been in a "nursing home" since November after falling and breaking his leg just above the left knee. The family skipped baseball and softball practice to go BBQ drink a few beers and hang out withhim this afternoon, which I have to tell you was a welcome break on my part.

When he pulled up at his house at 12:00 he had a shit eating grin from ear to ear on his face. The old man couldn't have been happier. He got out of the car, got in his wheelchair and went straight to the beer fridge to make sure he had enough for everyone. Luckily we had planned on that.

My uncle Phil fired up the grill and I seasoned up the Baby Backs, Chicken Thighs, TX Style Beef Ribs and Venison sausage and began the grilling. Well, unbeknownst to us, Opa was going back to his bathroom and pounding bourbon shots.

3pm. The food is done and so was Opa.  That man was FUCKED UP.  93 years old and smashed. My aunt put him to bed and we hung out and talked family politics for a while. The old man was glad to be home. That is for damn sure.

Welcome home Opa, you did it in style.

Niggers For Obama/FOD

I'm so sick and fucking tired of the double standard is this country when it comes to white people and African Americans blacks negros people of color niggers on what can and cannot be construed as being “racist”. I am fucking sick and tired of African Americans blacks negros people of color niggers getting a free pass to be as racially biased in everything by using the color of their skin to get whatever the fuck they want. This is fucking ridiculous! How in the hell is this happening right in front of our faces and not one gotdamn thing is being done to call it the hypocrisy that it is.

Sunday nights are supposed to be mellow and relaxing and then I hear about this hypocritical bullshit and am in need of some serious time at the range, or with a punching bag, or two hours hammering on the drums. Something. Fuck!

The entire story is here, but I didn't need to get past the first paragraph to know that it smells like we have a nigger in the woodpile right now and the media is gonna spin this every which way but how it really is.

Imagine if Ron Paul announced a national campaign called ‘Whites for Ron Paul’ – he’d be vilified as a racist. And yet Barack Obama has done the equivalent of precisely that with his launch of ‘African Americans for Obama’.

Not only is Obama playing the race card in an attempt to pressure black Americans into voting for him, he is also violating the separation between church and state. In the video promo for the campaign, Obama urges black people to pressure churches into supporting his administration by getting his message out via “the faith community”. He also calls on voters to become “congregation captains”.

As part of his efforts to lock down the black community as a voting bloc, Obama has arrived in Florida accompanied by an invasion of rappers and NBA basketball stars – all at taxpayer expense.

I don't feel like getting a visit from the SS anytime soon so I will keeps my comments to myself.

Here is the disgusting clip if you can muster through it without destroying your monitors.

Fuck this Kenyan racist piece of shit nigger. Fuck all of you that support this hypocritical pile of steamy dung. Fuck all of you that voted for this asshole. Fuck all of you that support this nigger trash! Fuck all of you dumb and blind motherfuckers don't see this for the transparent odor of hypocrisy that it is and that constantly flows from the left-wing lowlifes in this country and across the globe. Fuck you white folks that are too busy feeling guilty for being white to notice that there is a nigger cock fucking you in the ass every time you go out of your way to try and prove that you're not some white racist. You're getting ass-fucked hard, and you keep going back for more. It boggles the mind.

I can't wait to brawl in the streets with you fucks, I really can't.

Yeah, yeah I know; Minor Threat did the original version of this song but I like Slayer's version better so save it for the pussy fans of the Blink 182 pussies. This is fucking Slayer, bitch! Loud and proud!

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Friday Jams

A campfire in the backyard, a beer in hand and some bud in the bowl, with this blaring out of the speakers.

Life is good.

Aaaand the bud has kicked in.

Thanks to Top Gear America for this inspiration. You have to watch the whole series to get the, pun?

Friday, February 24, 2012

Got Ya Beat

This is so wrong!

:I Sorry. Not really...

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Commiefornia: Cooncracker's Dream

Way back before I retired from my job and went on permanent vacation status, I used to listen to Roger on the way home from work. This dude is sharp and he has his facts straight; something that drives the 'progressives' up the wall. Also, he's a local guy, so he talks a lot about the border and the wetback problem in this state, and he is a pro-Second Amendment guy and he is on top of what's really going on. Fox News should get rid of douchebag Hannity and let Roger have that spot. Hannity is just another GOP kiss-ass and on top of that he's fucking annoying. I can't stand his fucking voice and the way he always repeats himself over and over. Oh, and his laugh has to be the worst ever and he does it all the time. Fucking get rid of the douchebag already!

But I digress. If you were wondering what four more years of King Cooncracker will do to the rest of this country check it out and see what you have to look forward to...

Written by Roger Hedgecock, former Mayor of San Diego
Wednesday, 25 January 2012

I live in California. If you were wondering what living in Obama's second term might be like, wonder no longer. We in California are living there now.

California is a one-party state dominated by a virulent Democrat Left enabled by a complicit media where every agency of local, county, and state government is run by and for the public employee unions. The unemployment rate is 12%.

California has more folks on food stamps than any other state, has added so many benefits and higher rates to Medicaid that we call it "Medi-Cal." Our K-12 schools have more administrators than teachers, with smaller classes but lower test scores and higher dropout rates with twice the per-student budget of 15 years ago. Good job, Brownie.

This week, the once and current Gov. Jerry "Moonbeam" Brown had to confess that the "balanced" state budget adopted five months ago was billions in the red because actual tax revenues were billions lower than the airy-fairy revenue estimates on which the balance was predicated.

After trimming legislators' perks and reducing the number of cell phones provided to state civil servants, the governor intoned that drastic budget reductions had already hollowed out state programs for the needy, law enforcement and our schoolchildren. California government needed more money.

Echoing the Occupy movement, the governor proclaimed the rich must pay their fair share. Fair share? The top 1% of California income earners currently pays 50% of the state's income tax.

California has seven income tax brackets. The top income tax rate is 9.3%, which is slapped on the greedy rich earning at least $47,056 a year. Income of more than $1 million pays the "millionaires' and billionaires'" surcharge tax rate of 10.3%.

Brown's proposal would add 2% for income over $250,000. A million-dollar income would then be taxed at 12.3%. And that's just for the state.

Brown also proposed a one-half-cent sales tax increase, which would bring sales taxes (which vary by county) up to 7.75% to as much as 10%. Both tax increases would be on the ballot in 2012.

The sales tax increase proposal immediately brought howls of protest from the Left (of Brown). Charlie Eaton, a sociology grad student at UC Berkeley and leader of the UC Student-Workers Union, said, "We've paid enough. It's time for millionaires to pay."

At least five other ballot measures to raise taxes are circulating for signatures to get on the 2012 ballot in California. The governor's proposals are the most conservative.

The Obama way doesn't end with taxes.

The governor and the state legislature continue to applaud the efforts of the California High Speed Rail Authority to build a train connecting Los Angeles and San Francisco. Even though the budget is three times the voter-approved amount, and the first segment will only connect two small towns in the agricultural Central Valley. But hey, if we build it, they will ride.

And we don't want to turn down the Obama bullet-train bucks Florida and other states rejected because the operating costs would bankrupt them. Can't happen here because we're already insolvent.

If we get into real trouble with the train, we'll just bring in the Chinese. It worked with the Bay Bridge reconstruction. After the 1989 earthquake, the bridge connecting Oakland and San Francisco was rebuilt with steel made in China. Workers from China too. Paid for with money borrowed from China. Makes perfect sense.

In California, we hate the evil, greedy rich (except the rich in Hollywood, in sports, and in drug dealing). But we love people who have broken into California to eat the bounty created by the productive rich.

Illegals get benefits from various generous welfare programs, free medical care, free schools for their kids, including meals, and of course, instate tuition rates and scholarships too. Nothing's too good for our guests.

To erase even a hint of criticism of illegal immigration, the California Legislature is considering a unilateral state amnesty. Democrat State Assemblyman Felipe Fuentes has proposed an initiative that would bar deportation of illegals from California.

Interesting dilemma for Obama there. If immigration is exclusively a federal matter, and Obama has sued four states for trying to enforce federal immigration laws he won't enforce, what will the President do to a California law that exempts California from federal immigration law?

California is also near fulfilling the environmentalist dream of de-industrialization.

After driving out the old industrial base (auto and airplane assembly, for example), air and water regulators and tax policies are now driving out the high-tech, biotech and even Internet-based companies that were supposed to be California's future.

The California cap-and-trade tax on business in the name of reducing CO2 makes our state the leader in wacky environmentalism and guarantees a further job exodus from the state.

Even green energy companies can't do business in California. Solyndra went under taking its taxpayer loan guarantee with it.

No job is too small to escape the regulators. The state has even banned weekend amateur gold miners from the historic gold mining streams in the Sierra Nevada Mountains.

In fact, more and more of California's public land is off-limits to recreation by the people who paid for that land. Unless you're illegal.

Then you can clear the land, set up marijuana plantations at will, bring in fertilizers that legal farmers can no longer use, exploit illegal farm workers who live in hovels with no running water or sanitation, and protect your investment with armed illegals carrying guns no California citizen is allowed to own.

The rest of us only found out about these plantations when the workers' open campfire started one of those devastating fires that have killed hundreds of people and burned out thousands of homes in California over the last decade.

It's often said that whatever happens in California will soon happen in your state.

You'd better hope that's wrong.

Roger Hedgecock is a nationally syndicated radio talk-show host on RADIO STATION 760 KFMB, SAN DIEGO

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Fucking Epic!

Fucking awesome! Just flat out fucking awesome! I love how the Polynesian dude stood behind his words no matter how out numbered he was in the studio. Watch how the cracker bitches on the panel immediately go into "black people are the greatest thing in the world" mode. Typical. I fucking hate PC, but what I hate more than PC is dumb ass cracker bitches with white guilt driving their bullshit PC mindset.

I would love to buy the Polynesian dude a few rounds for being straight up about it. I wish more people on camera in front of huge audiences would say it like this. Not just say it like this, but also not apologize later because the usual nigger suspects are crying all over the place and demanding an apology. Fuck that! It's about time someone just came right out and told the free-ridin', food-stampin', whitey-blamin', Obama-votin', fast-food-fightin', racist niggers themselves how we feel. The only thing I would like to add to what the Polynesian dude said was a quote from the comments on Youtube:

" need white people because without them YOU WOULD HAVE NO ONE TO BLAME FOR YOUR INADEQUECIES."

Fucking EPIC!


What? I'm looking at the ceiling.

Monday, February 20, 2012



My aunt just sent this to me saying it was from the restroom at a Cracker Barrel. Pretty good, but it's an insult to restroom hand driers across the nation. The sticker should be stuck to the lids of the crappers in that john. I find the sound of a restroom hand drier much, much more pleasant to listen to than anything coming from the disgrace that's occupying the White House right now.

Fuck Obama!

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Light 'Em Up

I think you know what I'm talkin' 'bout.

For Harper

In the comments for my Made It... post below, Harper asked the following question...Sort of...

"How did a job search trip turn into...Oh, never mind."

For CharlieDelta!!

I think I found that governor...about 135...

Friday, February 17, 2012

Friday Jams

CenTex style...

The End

In one of those moods. Crankin' this shit full volume tonight. People fuckin' suck and I welcome the end for them!

Made It...

Well I made it. Countless Shiner Bocks and Lone Star tall cans throughout my seven day trip, various mixed drinks and shots with Paul, kerrcarto and kerrcarto's buddy Robert on Friday, shots of Patron at Chili's on Monday and the Patron shots at The Hard Rock Cafe down along the Riverwalk area Tuesday night, the Shiner Bock drafts and double Crown/Gingers at the airport in Houston during my three hour layover, and I was all but spent when the plane finally landed at Lindbergh Field Wednesday night. What a day! The highlight of my flying experience this trip was the two hot little early-20's chicks that sat next to me on the plane from Houston to San Diego Wednesday afternoon. Holy crap! Damn, if I was even 10 years younger, or half-sober (and not honest about my real age), maybe I would be with both of them right now partying down at the beach instead of writing my summary of the trip, alone and nursing a tall can of Bud just thinking about it. Oh well, some things just weren't meant to be I guess; and besides that, I fucking HATE the beach and dumbass beach bitches!

The trip? It was fun. More fun than I planned on having, but it was nice to mix up business with some fun. Life is too fuckin' short to be serious all the time. Paul was cool enough and offered to let me stay with him and his kids for a couple days in New Braunfels which I’m glad I did. That alone saved me a few hundred bucks in hotels. I finally got to meet Samuel and Cora and they are two funny kids. Typical kids. Samuel was home sick from school the whole week I guess, so he got to watch me sleep and listen to me fart and snore. That kid is a riot! Total trouble maker and shit talker if I've ever met one. There is no question that he is the offspring of Paul. Apple and tree, LMAO! Cora is the cutest little girl with an attention span of mine while having to suffer through another bullshit speech by Cooncracker or any other one of those douchebag democrat puppets that are always polluting the airwaves with their lies. She seemed like she was always on the move looking for the next fun to start. Cora was really polite and cute as a button; nothing but smiles and childhood innocence. You're a lucky man Paul. Your kids were hilarious. I didn't get to say goodbye to them like I wanted (gag-gifts, candy, jokes, etc.) but I'm sure I'll get to see them again, and you're probably glad they didn't have any more sugar for a while too. Good times man! Thanks Paul again for the room and board. You saved me some badly needed money right now. You almost laughed me right into a DWI, but think of all the money I saved by getting pulled over by the right Sheriff and avoiding that bank-draining offense. Seriously though, you saved me some cash that's not so readily available right now. I'll be able to hook you up for that better the next time I see you brother. Or when I have a steady job; whichever comes first.

Friday night Paul and I met up with kerrcarto and his buddy Robert in Boerne for some grubbin’ and some drinkin’. Kerrcarto already posted about the ass douche and his dumbass girlfriend we met when we were having dinner. After we ate, we went to some bar with some really shitty music, shot some pool and got shitfaced. Since I told Paul I would be the designated driver, I maintained an even buzz without crossing the line into wasted land. Alternating a few waters into the mix helped, but staying away from the liquor was the most effective. I started getting to the point where I just wanted to get completely smashed, so I went outside for a few smokes and some fresh air and away from the shots going down all around us. That was probably the smartest move I made that night. The dumbest came later on the ride home when me and Paul were talkin’ about his newly purchased used car and I made some comment like, “yeah, too bad this fucking this is governed” or something like that. Paul fired back some defensive drunken babble like I was talking shit about his car when I really wasn’t; I was just stating what I was sure to be true from my experience driving family sedans. So as his drunk ass was calling me a pussy and telling me to “floor it” to prove to him it was governed, I was noticing that there were absolutely no cars on the road in front of us or behind us. Perfect! I think we were on Hwy. 46, some dark and sometimes curvey two-lane road with hardly any street lights or homes or much of anything that I can remember so it was a perfect road to prove that I was right.

So I floored it. 75, 80, 85, 90…..95 and still climbing. Most cars from the 2000’s that I have driven have all been governed at 95 mph at the highest. Believe me, I like to take every car I drive to its max speed at least once just to see what it has. Once that needle hits 95 mph (85 mph in most cases) the power kicks off and the car starts to decrease speed even with the pedal to the floor. Once about 5 mph or so under the governed speed the power kicks back in but only until the needle crosses the governed speed limit again. This fucker kept climbing; 100, 105….

We’re crankin’ Alice in Chains on the stereo and Paul is laughing like a fucking drunken hyena or something as we’re rounding the corners with nothing but open road. Just as I think I should probably slow it down since I was already proven to be wrong regarding the governor, I looked in the rear view mirror and that empty sunken feeling in my stomach was the next thing I felt as I saw the blue flashing lights of a squad car coming up fast behind me. I know those lights too well, so I was sure my entire trip was fucked, I was going to jail, my plans to move to Texas would also be fucked because I was gonna soon be a broke motherfucker and on top of all that, I was going to have to listen to Paul laughing the entire time I was failing doing the field sobriety test, getting the shit beat out of me answering the officer’s questions, and getting the shit kicked out of me again booked into jail.

Officer: Good evening. You have any idea how fast you were going back there?

Me: Not completely sure sir, but I think it was somewhere around 80-85 mph.

Officer: Yeah, uh try 105 mph. (Paul laughing his ass off in the background) You had anything to drink tonight?

Me: Yes sir, I had about four beers.

Officer: License and proof of insurance please. (Paul coughing because he’s still laughing his ass off)

Me: Yes sir.

Paul: Here’s my license too dude. I just bought this car but I don’t have the title yet. Or the registration.

So the Officer is standing there with two drunks, one of them laughing like he’s having a great time, a car with no registration or title to show for, a half-drunk with a California license who thinks he’s Mario fucking Andretti in a family sedan, and a wasteoid with a Washington license sitting shotgun who claims he just bought the car but doesn’t have title or registration to prove it.

So the officer went back to his car for a while and let me stew in my grief, frustration, and yes……..Paul laughing about it. This whole time my life is flashing in front of my eyes. What the fuck am I going to do? What the fuck was I thinking? Why is Paul still fucking laughing?

A few minutes later the officer came back, threw our licenses and paperwork at me and said something like, “Looks like tonight is your lucky night. I just got another call that I need to get to. YOU need to SLOW DOWN buddy!” I said, “Yes sir!” and with that he was peeling out of the parking lot heading the direction we were just coming from.


I drove straight back to New Braunfels going the speed limit, we stopped at Denny’s for some midnight breakfast and went over exactly what had just gone down. As you may have guessed, Paul was laughing even harder now, and I may have let out a little chuckle as we determined that the officer most likely let us go because he was looking at a fucking mound of paperwork for the rest of his shift. DWI, speeding in excess of 50 mph over the posted limit, California drunk driving the unregistered vehicle, Washington drunk supposedly the owner, no title, no registration and whatever else he could rack up on us me. I guarantee I didn’t really laugh or find the humor of it all until Saturday afternoon at some point. Even now, I’m kicking myself in the nuts for trying to pull off some rookie drunkard bullshit like that. Fuck!

Sunday I headed off toward Corpus Christie, made it about half way down there and said fuck it. Turned around and headed back up Hwy. 35 towards New Braunfels (where I felt safe) check into some hotel right next to Chilis, took a shower, got fucked up at the bar at Chilis went back to my room and passed out. I woke up the next morning afternoon and went back to the scene of the crime and took the 46 west from New Braunfels to I-10 and then continued westbound towards Kerrville. I wanted to ambush kerrcarto but I was short on time since Paul had already got us tickets to some rodeo back in San Antonio that night, or at least that was the information I was given. I got as far as the Kerrville exit and basically just turned around and headed back east so I would have plenty of time to check into a hotel so I wasn’t holding Paul and the kids at all for the rodeo. I never heard shit from Paul and it was close to 6 p.m. well after he was out of work so I called him to find out WTF. He told me the rodeo wasn’t until the following Monday. Had I known that, I could’ve and would’ve spent some time cruising around Kerrville just to check it out. Nigger me this Batman! Oh well, that’s just how it goes I guess.

Tuesday I took a cab from my hotel down to the Riverwalk area since I had never seen it before and I planted my as at the bar of the Hard Rock CafĂ© and got fucked up for Valentine’s Day. The cabbie that took me back to my hotel was some dude from Turkey that said he had been here for 25 years. Of course I brought up politics with the guy and he had me rolling in the back seat laughing the whole ride back. With his accent it was a little hard to make out everything he was saying, but “Obama asshole” was clear as a bell and the guy used it a lot. He didn’t have one good thing to say about Cooncracker, so him and I got along just fine. I got back to my hotel, pounded a few beers at the Applebee’s bar next door, spilled my drink all over some dude’s meal and the bartender’s purse, almost got in a fight with some guy that only heard about my spillage but it somehow ruined his night, went back to my room, passed the fuck out, took the shuttle to the airport in the morning and said, “until next time Texas.” The highlight of the flight home was two hot little early-20’s chicks that sat next to me from Houston to San Diego. They were both 22 years old and heading down to Pacific Beach to party with some friends for the weekend. I got the blonde’s phone number when she sent me this picture she took, but probably won’t even call her. I might have had a chance, if I wasn’t so hammered on the flight that I told them my real age instead of the usual, “I’m 26 but feel like I’m 18” bullshit line. Well, maybe I’ll text her Saturday and see what’s up, but I doubt they’re gonna wanna hang out with borning ‘old dude’ who just wants a piece of ass anyways.

The trip wasn't as successful as I had originally hoped, but it was far from a failure considering how little I really prepared for it. I am a little bummed that I didn't get to make it up to Dallas for a drink or two with Harper or TWS. That would've been cool. At the very least, flying out for a week helped me determine the general area I would like to move to without question or doubt. Obviously, whatever work I find will narrow that part down even more, but for the most part I like the New Braunfels area as well as Kerr County and Boerne and everything in between. The busy part of New Braunfels made me feel right at home. No matter what, I will definitely experience some culture shock when I move, but it won't be so drastic of a shock if some of the things that annoy me are there; like Mexicans, crowds and traffic. I don't think I'd be able to pull off the change of environment if none of those things were there to keep me alert and watching my back. City boy? You bet your ass I am.