Tuesday, February 28, 2012

NASCAR Sucks, Airbourne Doesn't

On Sunday I went to a party at a buddy's house to watch the Daytona 500, pound a bunch of PBR drafts from the home tapper and get de-runk. Not just an average day of throwing back countless beers and getting a good beer buzz, but more like getting good and belligerent, stumbly, fall-down, take off all your clothes, molest a bbq grill, piss-your-pants, legally and medically fucking shitfaced, plowed smashed drunk! To be honest, I didn’t even go to watch the race. I went to hang out with some good friends and get shitty drunk on a Sunday afternoon like God intended us to do. So I did.

I’m sure I’m gonna get a lot of shit for saying this, but getting sloshed is the only way I can sit in the house on a beautiful Sunday afternoon to watch a bunch of cars going around in circles for 500 miles or laps or whatever the fuck. I mean, how fucking exciting can that really get? Really? At least IndyCar tracks have multiple curves and turns that hold my interest for a little while. Unless there are some major wrecks and pileups on the track, NASCAR bores the living shit out of me.

But now there’s more. After I recently read about this fucking PC garbage from hell, my interest in watching NASCAR has dropped even more, if that was even possible. Not only does it bore the hell out of me, now they just went and shit the bed and they have lost all respect I ever had for the sport. In fact, they just earned the highest level of disrespect to be shown by me. What the fuck is with this bullshit “diversity” they are calling for in the sport? Who fucking gives two shits about “diversity?” (Which by the way is the biggest code word of the 21st Century, slowly chipping away at all things good and great in this country.) Diversity. GMAFB!

Sure, NASCAR is trying to market their shit to reach as many people as possible, but is that really going to include full on niggers, whiggers, jiggers, chiggers and wetbiggers too? Are they hoping for gang shootings in the stands at NASCAR races nationwide? Isn’t anything sacred anymore? Are we going to have some gansta nigga thugs on Pit Row with their jiggaboo jalopy with fucking curb feelers and spinny-wheels now? Is there going to be a BET car too? Maybe they could get Plaxico, or Michael Irvin, or Lawrence Taylor to drive the jiggaboo BET jalopy. Oh wait! How about OJ? There’s some diversity for ya! Is there anything or anyone’s asses they won’t kiss if there’s even a miniscule chance they might buy a fucking over-priced Kyle Busch shirt or an “Official NASCAR” over-priced license plate frame or over-priced nose hair trimmer? What the fuck!

I will now be going out of my way to make sure that I don’t give any business of any kind to anything NASCAR related. Ever. Sorry NASCAR, but you fucked up big denying the General Lee like that. I am surprised and really can’t believe how fast the PC pussification infected your entire organization. I would’ve expected more from you, so you have let me down yet again.

I hope you lose more fans from this than you ever gain. A lot more. Here’s an idea for next time; if someone says they are offended by the Confederate Flag, tell them that you don’t give a fuck and they should stick to watching Piss Mathews, Cuntessa Brewer, Bill Maher and Rosie and that they should stay in their little world of disinformation. Or try to offer them a lesson in American history. If they still don’t get it, try beating some sense into them with a crowbar or aluminum baseball bat. Only after all other avenues are exhausted, then try offering up your puckering lips to firmly plant on their ignorant asses!

Fuck you NASCAR!

Well shit. It happened again. The Youtube clip below was the original reason for this post and was supposed to be the only thing this post was about. It was going to follow the first paragraph in this post and have nothing except maybe a “Fuck Yeah!” after it. To me this is an obvious sign of THC deficiency in my system and should be remedied as soon as humanly possible.

I hadn’t heard of these guys before Sunday. I guess the latest iPhones have some app where you can hold your phone up to the TV or radio and it will tell you the song and the band. Pretty cool. A different song was in a commercial while we were watching the Daytona rain delay and I was curious who the band was. About three people pointed their iPhones at the TV at the same time to try and capture the song and that’s all it took. Airbourne; from Australia no less. I like how the lead guitarist is also the lead singer. That’s just not something you see every day. I also know that if you’re going to get out on stage with one of those Gibson Explorer guitars, you better not be playing shitty little Curt Cobain basic beginner leads. You better fucking shred with that guitar because it was made for a shredder, not some novice FNG wanna-be cock rocker!

I like these guys. Of course I’ve always been a huge AC/DC fan so I’m sure that has a little to do with it. Now before you get all frothy and your panties twisted in your crack, I’m not trying to compare these guys to AC/DC because that would just be fucking dumb. No one is like AC/DC. Period. But, you can definitely hear the Malcolm/Angus influence in their music that’s for sure.

This is one of those live extended intros that I happen to like, but if you aren't into that kind of thing, they kick off the song at about 3:00 on the counter.

Fuck yeah!

4 comments:

rayvet said...

Regarding the confederate flag. When I moved to Georgia from Jersey in 83, my first experience in college was a dorm mate hanging a confederate flag. I immediately expressed my opinion that it was the flag of a "loser" cause with ignorant rednecks, racists, etc. etc. (remember, I was a yankee new to this land). A VERY BIG black fella in my dorm (that we all became to be very good friends with) expressed the same moral outrage. The flag bearer, a guy named Duane from VERY southern Georgia took the time to explain what the flag meant to him, his family and most of the southerners. I then started reading and learning about the south both prior to and during the Civil war and instantly became a fan with a new found respect for the southern culture and the flag that represents them. So anyone that considers the flag to be offensive, they're clueless idiots, just as I was at 18 years old. Do some research, reading and learning, and I promise you your opinion of the flag and what it represents will change dramatically. If it doesn't, you're a liberal idiot and history books are wasted on you anyway.
Ray

kerrcarto said...

go get you a shirt

Anonymous said...

Great post man
MM

Anonymous said...

Driving in a circle is about as gay as it gets. I would literally rather watch paint dry. Anyone can drive fast in a circle. And don't gimme that Shit about " its all about controlling the car" those cars already have excellent control. Nascar eats a giant cock. And fuck the ppl who say " if you don't like it don't watch it" I've never watched a " race" in my life. The fact that it gets any airtime at all and is a complete waste of fuel is enough reason for me. I can only pray that there is a complete pileup and everone dies so we don't have to hear anymore about this so called sport. WOOOOOO!! LEFT TURNS!! WOOOOOO!! FUCKING GAY.