Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Practice - They Need Some...

Now I'm not usually one to judge another person's talents or ability to create music, especially when it comes to playing the guitar. I know how hard and frustrating it can be to master scales or chord progression, or theory. I don't even know what I can compare it to, but let's just say it's not like learning to ride a bicycle or fix the fuckin' toilet when it leaks. It's fuckin' hard!  Hell, I've been playing the guitar off and on for about 30 years and I will be the first to admit that I still suck. I have a long way to go before I'm playing anything worthy of someone buying a ticket to come hear. When I think about it realistically I know it's never going to happen. But damn it sure is fun!

Not to sound like I'm striving to achieve rock star status or anything like it, because I'm not. Sure it would be pretty cool to be up on stage wailing out some rock n' roll to a stadium sized crowd, going on tours across the United States and other countries, and of course banging countless groupie sluts along the way. I'm not holding my breath for that to happen though. At this point, I think I am more suited to be a studio musician recoding soundtracks for movies, television programs, and beer commercials anyways. Yeah, beer commercials. There are groupie sluts for those too right?

If you've ever thought about picking up the guitar, or any instrument for that matter, there are a few things it might help you to know about before you dive right in and start blowing a bunch of money on another 'hobby' that goes nowhere. Creating music takes a lot of dedication, understanding, practice, and patience. Extra helpings of all four will make the learning experience much more enjoyable for you and those that have to hear you play. Especially those that have to hear you play.

Like I said, I'm not usually one to judge another person's talents or ability (unless they're arrogant when they play) no matter how bad they might sound. Having said that, I think this band definitely needs to practice more. Not just the guitarist, all of them! And by practice more I mean four-hour sets, seven days a week for two months straight before they step onto another stage.

Why they're all pickin' on the guitarist doesn't make much sense to me because they all could use a little (a lot) more practice, but I have wanted to do that to a few people I've jammed with before. It's usually the guy who gets too fucked up before the jam session to bother even trying to sound halfway decent. If you can't handle listening to the effective CIA stinkbeard interrogation tool music, just skip ahead to 0:45 on the counter.

Now that I think about it, I'd like to bitchslap that guy for having a mullet and sounding like shit. If you're gonna wear a fuckin' mullet while being in a band, you better shred it up or you're doing a disservice to the Mullet Musician Community, and that's just wrong on any level!

This whole post just reminded me of a motivational poster I saw over at GrouchyOldCripple about five years ago. It's as true and accurate as it gets when it comes to playing the guitar as far as I'm concerned...


Anonymous said...

yep--that broke the Suck-O-Meter!

JC said...

Jeebus! Been playing in front of people since I was maybe 14. But you've got to admit, it does take some courage to stand up and just do it. I'm 50 now, and play better, but still suffer from crippling shyness in most social circumstances. But I'm not mic shy.

Greasywrench AKA rich b said...

I played for a couple of years. I had a couple of disadvantages. For one, I'm left handed and whenever I had to learn new chords I had to transpose them backwards. Big pain in the ass. Two, being a mechanic my hands were always fucked up - burns, cuts, broken knuckles, blah blah blah. Even after taking lessons (for me a waste of money) for a year I finally gave up.

I've always compared playing a guitar to being a golfer. Millions of people golf and play guitars. But only a very very few become good enough to do it professionally.

Anonymous said...

Not sure if something sucks?
There's an app for that!


Anonymous said...

Charlie ...dudley1 here , I tried to learn to play the guitar & really could not get past basic chords . I am left handed & tried to play right handed. Any way had some success strumming rhythm in the house band where I tended bar in my 20`s attracting a few brain dead groupies.
Forget the beer commercial groupies, when they get the DT`s during intimate moments it gets scary.

CharlieDelta said...

LOL! dudley1, I'll keep that in mind the next time I come across some beer commercial groupies.

Southpaw huh? Me too. I took lessons when I was 12 and couldn't find anyone willing to teach me to play left handed so I had to learn right handed. Now it would just seem weird to play lefty, but I always will wonder if I would've picked it up quicker and been better had I learned to play lefty.

Where's my reparations??

JC said...

Chet Atkins and George Harrison both played right and autographed left.